2nd Semester at VCFA MFA in Graphic Design: I was going to continue studies about Agnes Martin (1912-2004), lines and grids, geometry, collected ephemera and beeswax and resin, but my mother went into hospice during this semester and my attention turned inward and to spending more time with her.

Slowly processing the grief of letting her go I started shredding my favorite books. 6 x 6 feet was a human-sized canvas that Agnes Martin liked to use, and I wanted to build the hexagon large enough to surround the viewer.

Also, I was studying beekeeping at the time and the hexagonal shape was important to me to contain the grief and capture the journey of saying goodbye — to work through the loss. The books were altered and rearranged. I was altered through the process and for the first time in my life I truly trusted my own instincts and was able to sit on my hands until I had a clear decision to move forward with each step of the process. My advisor was Yoon Soo Lee. 

“And once the storm is over you won’t remember you how made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what the storm’s all about. — Haruki Murakami